Bad Mommy

I had a bite of chocolate.

It was French.

It was smooth and creamy and crunchy and dammit it left my tongue wanting more.  Seriously, I have not had a piece of chocolate in six months.  Six months.  When I was pregnant I ate the stuff every day, so having to go without for so long has been... well, not that bad actually.  (I've learned to really love juice.)

Anyway.

Now, you may ask, why am I eating chocolate, when most chocolate has MILK in it?

What?

The doctor said JG has an INTOLERANCE, not an allergy, and I thought why not?  Alex was eating a French bar of the good stuff and for the first time I had the impulse to make myself happy, rather than making sure that JG doesn't bleed out of her butt... colon.

I had a bad mommy moment (and my dreams are filled with them, nightmares really, where I pig out on ice cream only to realize after my third milkshake that I can't eat the stuff - oh my poor baby girl!)

Was it a good choice?

No.

But at least it was only two days of screaming poop (because the intolerance causes a lot of pain, I imagine) with flecks of blood.  It used to be three days.  So her colon is slowly learning how to deal with the milk proteins, and hopefully in a couple of months there will be more improvements.

And then, and then, those milkshakes better be shaking in their boots because I'm gonna get so fat eating their offspring.

So. Fat.